Resentments and criticism can clog the flow of love for generations.
One’s tendency to hold resentments and maintain a critical outlook can sometimes be related to attachment style, as children observe parents and often mimic their attachment style and their associated attitudes toward criticism and resentment.
For instance, some parents keep an emotional distance and barely give children the attention they need, so those children grow up and repeat the pattern of emotional distance. Other parents are so emotionally needy, inappropriate and overly controlling that children question their love and feel like they are walking on eggshells. Such abuse can create a needy and fearful attachment. Children then grow up and respond to their romantic partners, children, and even employers in a similar secure, distant, anxious, and/or ambivalent way that was formed with their parents.
Examine the patterns your parents inherited and see if you can identify similarities in yourself and your siblings. List your resentments and criticisms and then try to see if you can find gratitude for what you’ve learned, compassion for the generations in your family tree, and tolerance for the love that wants to flow from your heart. Letting love freely flow from your heart allows forgiveness to emerge and heal the patterns for future generations.
Inspiration for the Day: “We do as we have been done by.” –John Bowlby
Note: This is an ongoing series to help provide support during these challenging times. These daily readings are part of an overall book on balance, which includes 12 essentials for maintaining balance to support resilience and your best self. The 12 essentials include mind, body, love, service, self, family, intimacy, purpose, environment/living space, nature, social relations, and spirit. This series is sharing 30 days of lessons about love. It will examine multiple aspects of love and provide knowledge and inspiration for hearts to heal and love to flow. It is designed as a daily reader to allow time to reflect, process and incorporate.
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