No one word can describe what it feels like to go through a divorce. People have different experiences. Some people are relieved while others are completely devastated. In fact, it's not uncommon to experience a little of both feelings in varying forms at different times. There is a light at the end of the tunnel of divorce. To help you know what to expect while going through a divorce, here are 8 common stages of divorce. Some people reach all 8 stages while others hover at lower stages until future relationships take them to the last stage.
1. Experiencing a roller coaster of emotions that range from numbness to intense feelings of anger, fear, pain, sadness and even joy, love, hope and excitement. The feelings continue to cycle until healing occurs.
2. Pulling away from others and almost obsessing exclusively on partner to seeking validation through an assortment of love interests or engaging in a serious passionate affair, with person having opposite characteristics of partner.
3. Grieving loss of identity and combined memory--divorce identity crisis.
4. Losing oneself in activities (work, play, gambling, eating, travel, sex).
5. Having moments of clarity and spiritual lifting followed by pain and then lifting and then pain...with each lifting time lasting a little longer and each painful return being slightly improved.
6. Slowly, an appreciation for partner and shared life creeps up. Some, but not all, can even attain the "lesson" learned from the experience.
7. After healing, a new identity reveals itself and old passions and interests are reignited.
8. An independence and confidence coupled with deeper humility and appreciation for others occurs.
Comments